Running time is my new quiet time with God. Instead of sitting in a chair to pray, I find that I feel close to Him when I run. I feel like I can bring anything up without fear of offending Him. My body feels a release through working hard physically and my mind and emotions let go with the cold wind and quiet that comes from no headphones, cell phone, or to do list.
On a run last week, I was thinking through some things that I see as obstacles in my life. I wondered what God would have to say about them. I began to try my theories out by speaking them aloud. I started with, "If God is with me, then [demolition of current hardship]." But, that didn't ring true with my spirit. Something was off.
I tried a different angle. "WHEN God is with me, then [WWIII blasts my problems]." Hmmm...still not right. This was feeling like Goldilocks and the Three Bears. I needed to try again.
"BECAUSE God is with me, then [total annihilation of all badness everywhere]." YES! That was it! God is not my IF, nor is He my WHEN. God is my BECAUSE. His presence is not in question. The fruit of His presence is mine for the taking. Thank You, Jesus.
Saturday, October 22, 2011
Psalm 46:10
"Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth."
In the past year, I have been battling anxiety. I have physical reactions that are often overwhelming. Recently, Psalm 46:10 became very powerful to me. In the midst of an anxious situation where my heart began accelerating and my breathing became rapid, I actually spoke to my body:
Be still, heart, and know that He is God.
Be still, lungs, and know that He is God.
Be still, racing thoughts, and know that He is God.
Be still.
He is God.
Praise God for healing, one step at a time, as His Word takes hold in every part of my being.
In the past year, I have been battling anxiety. I have physical reactions that are often overwhelming. Recently, Psalm 46:10 became very powerful to me. In the midst of an anxious situation where my heart began accelerating and my breathing became rapid, I actually spoke to my body:
Be still, heart, and know that He is God.
Be still, lungs, and know that He is God.
Be still, racing thoughts, and know that He is God.
Be still.
He is God.
Praise God for healing, one step at a time, as His Word takes hold in every part of my being.
Correspondence From the Ledge
I wrote this poem last month, about one week after my life hit a very low and desperate place. Sometimes I struggle to come to God in those places. Writing poetry helps a lot.
Dear God,
Remember how I used to be?
I used to leap over the hills
Singing all the way.
We had such sweet times,
You and I.
I was happier then
And people admired me.
What am I doing on this cold mountain ledge today?
Why am I fighting the wind,
Clinging to crumbling rock with tired fingers?
I am so tired and afraid.
If only I could go back to those hills.
Right now.
I could do better than I'm doing here.
-Your Brooke
Dear Brooke,
I do remember how you used to be.
Your singing and leaping was sweet indeed.
That was my provision for you
Back then.
Today, my grace has you securely standing on this ledge,
Wind and all.
Tomorrow, we may do something new,
Or we may enjoy this spot a while longer.
Either way, our journey keeps on going.
See, daughter,
Brace yourself for this news -
We aren't going back to the hills.
I'm taking you to places you've never been before.
I've known all along.
Wait until you see - -
It is so awesome further ahead!
But for now,
Release those weary fingers.
Sit with me,
Close to me.
Let's savor the view from here.
-Your God
.
Dear God,
Remember how I used to be?
I used to leap over the hills
Singing all the way.
We had such sweet times,
You and I.
I was happier then
And people admired me.
What am I doing on this cold mountain ledge today?
Why am I fighting the wind,
Clinging to crumbling rock with tired fingers?
I am so tired and afraid.
If only I could go back to those hills.
Right now.
I could do better than I'm doing here.
-Your Brooke
Dear Brooke,
I do remember how you used to be.
Your singing and leaping was sweet indeed.
That was my provision for you
Back then.
Today, my grace has you securely standing on this ledge,
Wind and all.
Tomorrow, we may do something new,
Or we may enjoy this spot a while longer.
Either way, our journey keeps on going.
See, daughter,
Brace yourself for this news -
We aren't going back to the hills.
I'm taking you to places you've never been before.
I've known all along.
Wait until you see - -
It is so awesome further ahead!
But for now,
Release those weary fingers.
Sit with me,
Close to me.
Let's savor the view from here.
-Your God
.
Hello Again
For the past few months, I've met once a week with a small group of women to work through this heinie-kicking book that encouraged us to take risks for God. There's much, much more to tell about that journey, but for now, you should know that that group is the reason I am revisiting this blog. We learned that God asks us to take risks with the gifts He's given us. Writing and teaching are two areas that make me feel absolutely alive - I believe they are indeed gifts from God. I had never considered what it would look like to a risk with either gift. One friend in the group said, "Have you ever thought about writing a blog?"
As it turns out, I have a blog. This very one that you've stumbled upon or purposely sought out today. And, I'm going to write again. I am in a wonderful and difficult season of life now and I expect the posts will reflect that reality. I am letting go of an expectation of perfection or publish-worthy material, so be prepared for work that baffles and bores along with the more inspiring pieces.
If you've read this blog before, you may notice that it has a new title. Psalm 84 is a life passage of sorts. I believe that we are all sojourners, committed to pilgrimage. By God's grace, we make the valleys "a place of springs" and "go from strength to strength". My hope is that what I write here will give you courage to keep going. To commit to your own journey with God, knowing that this will surely mean taking crazy scary risks and, at the end, finding truth. Bless you, my travel buddies. Thanks for reading.
As it turns out, I have a blog. This very one that you've stumbled upon or purposely sought out today. And, I'm going to write again. I am in a wonderful and difficult season of life now and I expect the posts will reflect that reality. I am letting go of an expectation of perfection or publish-worthy material, so be prepared for work that baffles and bores along with the more inspiring pieces.
If you've read this blog before, you may notice that it has a new title. Psalm 84 is a life passage of sorts. I believe that we are all sojourners, committed to pilgrimage. By God's grace, we make the valleys "a place of springs" and "go from strength to strength". My hope is that what I write here will give you courage to keep going. To commit to your own journey with God, knowing that this will surely mean taking crazy scary risks and, at the end, finding truth. Bless you, my travel buddies. Thanks for reading.
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