Transformation 3: Consistency

This is the third post in a five part collection about my word from God for 2016 – TRANSFORM.

Last year, I bought a plant because its label read “Thrives on Neglect”.  “Perfect,”  I thought, tucking  it into my cart.  A year ago, inconsistency characterized many areas of my life – plant care included.  Part of that was due to taking care of a newborn who wasn’t terribly concerned with schedules or routines.  The other part was my habit of blowing off anything that seemed hard.  The trouble was, I was still wearing maternity pants and that bugged the heck out of me.  If only I could figure out a way to keep neglecting exercise and get back to my pre-pregnancy weight.  As it turned out, I needed help beyond exercise.  Throughout the year, God showed me more of Himself through building consistency in my life.

Once I realized that God was leading me in greater consistency, my baseline requirement for myself was to just show up.  Sometimes I studied a Bible passage and sometimes I sang some worship songs in the shower.   Sometimes I walked on the treadmill and sometimes I lifted weights with a friend.  Feelings, time of day, method – those things were secondary to simply doing what I said I’d do.  While this may seem like a low metric for success, I discovered powerful things can happen when you show up.

One morning, I was in a pretty deep slump.  Some tough things had happened and I was projecting my feelings on God.  The last thing I wanted to do was go to Bible study.  I wasn’t in the mood to smile and sing.  But, guess what?  I was committed to consistency.  Showing up.  So, I got myself and Luke dressed and we went.  At Bible study, they choose a different table group to receive prayer every week.  Our table hadn’t been called yet, and in my brooding, I knew my table was going to be picked that day.  “It would be just like God to reach out to me when I’m mad at Him,” I thought.  I was like a sullen teenager who still expects their parent to knock on their door and offer a hug.  The study leader rustled her fingers in the box and pulled out a paper.  “Table 5!” she read.  That’s me!

That prayer time was restorative.  I felt like a new person at the end.  One of the women who prayed for me suggested that I sign up for a ministry session called Sozo, where trained intercessors lead you through deep healing prayer.  I followed through and made an appointment.  When they asked me why I was there, I told them I was showing up to see what God would do.  That was becoming my answer for a lot of things in life.  God met with me and I actually had a lot of fun during the session.

On the way home that night, I noticed a man jogging on the sidewalk and I felt like I was supposed to help him somehow.  It was dark and I was by myself, so I wanted to make sure I was hearing from God.  I turned the car around and told God, “If he’s still there when I drive back that way, I’ll stop.”  The guy was still there, so I pulled over onto a side street and walked to the sidewalk to meet him.    “Hi!” I called out, “Do you need a ride home?”  I honestly wasn’t sure why God wanted me to stop, so I took a stab at the reason.  The man apologized for not understanding me and said he didn’t speak English very well.  I live in a town with a strong Spanish-speaking community, but I don’t know Spanish.  Bummer, right?  Well, this is God we’re talking about, so the story’s not over.  As I got closer to the man, I realized he wasn’t Hispanic.  

“Ni hui shuo Zhongwen ma?” I asked (Do you speak Chinese?).  His eyes brightened and he nodded.  I don’t speak Spanish, but I do speak some Chinese.  This man was from a town near Beijing, where I lived for one year.  He ran a local restaurant and was out jogging for exercise.  I tried to tell him that God asked me to stop and talk to him.  I wasn’t making sense though.  So, I asked if he knew Jesus.  Yes, he respected Jesus.  “Jesus is your friend,” I said in Mandarin.  The man’s eyes widened and he shook his head no.  “It’s true,” I said, “Jesus is your friend.”  The situation must have gotten too weird for him at that point because he said he had to go home, and he continued his jog.  I don’t know what God is doing in that man’s life, or why we had that stilted conversation.  It strikes me as unique, though, that in a town of Spanish speakers, I pull over to talk to the one Chinese speaker. 

I never made a goal to tell a Chinese man about Jesus’ friendship.  I said yes to God asking me to be consistent and I went to Bible study when I didn’t feel like going.  That decision opened the door to the next yes, and the next. 

There are so many little ways He helped me add consistency over the past year:  morning Bible reading, planning our weekly dinners, reading with Luke every day, regularly spending time with my great aunt.    Something that made this transformation much easier was involving others.  With exercise, it started with two other moms going for walks with me.  One time, we did yoga in the living room while Luke took a nap in my friend’s son’s crib.  Later, God gave me another friend who wanted to run with me twice a week.  It’s snowy outside, so now we lift weights in her basement with four little boys playing all around us.  Many days, I don’t want to exercise, but I know my friend waiting for me and neither of us is going to be the first one to cancel.  I don’t think I could have been this dedicated on my own. 

Matthew 6:33 tells us to seek God’s kingdom and His righteousness first, and all these things will be given to us too.  This verse follows instructions to not worry about all the little stuff in life – what to eat, what to wear, etc.  Those are “these things”.  In giving this message, I feel like Jesus understood my propensity to run after these positive changes for my own benefit.  It’s a deeper challenge for me to say, “God, whether I get the outcome I want or not, please use this commitment for Your purposes.  What do You want out of this?”  God’s goodness in our life begins with seeking Him.

Looking back is affirming because I can see how much growth happened.   I can be hard on myself for the times when I have trouble sticking to commitments.  I still forget to water the plants.  It’s good that I buy the ones that don’t need much attention.  However, this transformation has shown me that I don’t thrive on neglect.