Say Okay

This fall, I have a student teacher.  Slowly, she’s been taking on more and more responsibility.  I’m backing off from involvement with the kids and focusing my energy on coaching Miss C.  When she’s teaching and the kids come to me for help, I point to Miss C. and tell them, “Ask your teacher.  Miss C. is in charge right now.”  This past week, Miss C. led all but one hour of the school day.  It was interesting to see the students test her boundaries. 

One day, the Reading Class was especially wild and basically ignored her directions.  A tall, blonde girl named Emilia repeatedly got out of her seat and wandered the classroom during a test.  Miss C. kept asking her to sit down and stop disturbing others.  Each time, Emilia had an excuse.  I’m trying hard to let Miss C. be the boss, but when Emilia talked back to Miss C. the fifth time, I looked up from my computer and busted out my authoritative voice.  

“Emilia, when a teacher asks you to do something, you say okay and do it.  That’s it.”  

Emilia’s eyes got wide and she quickly sat down.  Minutes later, she started to get up again.  I made eye contact, shook my head no, and she plopped back down.  I smiled and gave a thumbs up.  Emilia giggled and picked up her book to read.

Today at church, the pastor made time for listening prayer.  We were supposed to ask God what was getting in the way of serving Him fully.  When I prayed, I remembered this situation with Emilia.  I really want what’s best for Emilia.  When I used my authority with her, it wasn’t without a strong, intentional plan of helping her and others succeed at reading.  Emilia is not a blatantly disobedient kid.  She just likes to do things in her time and in her way, which unfortunately, keeps her from learning as best as she could.  The excuses are minor, but they add up to a lot of wasted class time.  I thought about how often I don’t outright say no to God, but like Emilia, I give a little excuse and flit around with my own avoidance habits.  I debate with Him and don’t trust His authority or purpose enough to respond when He nudges me.

I stopped by the grocery store on the way home from church.  My mind was occupied with random stuff, like the magazine cover of Princess Kate Middleton, as I chose the shortest of the busy checkout lines.  When it was my turn, the checker barely acknowledged me.  Her head was down, and she worked in a kind of harried way.  

A phrase clearly popped into my head: “Looks like a busy day.  May I pray for you about anything?”  

It was weird.  My heartbeat sped up, which is usually my indicator that I’ve heard something from God.  This is where I typically start debating with Him about whether or not I actually heard from Him, or if I’m mistaken and about to embarrass myself.  

Another phrase came:  “When your teacher tells you to do something, you say okay.”  

My hands started to shake with nervousness.  The checker was still looking down, finishing scanning my groceries.  I asked God to give me a clear window to say what He put in my mind.  As the credit card processed, I spoke up.  

“It looks like you’re really busy today.  Is there anything I can pray for you about?”  

The checker stopped working and looked at me with intensity.  Her lower lip began to quiver.  

“Yes,” she said, fighting tears and going back to focusing on the cash register, “You can pray about something.  My brother just died.” 

“Okay, I’ll pray for you,” I said. “I think God told me to ask you that, so just know that He loves you.” 

I usually don’t get help out to the car, but the teenage bag boy insisted on taking my groceries for me.  He said he had to go outside and collect carts anyway.  

As we walked out, he said, “I never hear people do stuff like that.”  

I asked, “Do you believe in God?”  

He said yes, but that things were funky for him spiritually.  “I used to pray for people and even saw some miracles and stuff, but I don’t do that anymore.”  

I told him how nervous I had been to ask the checker about prayer.  He shared more about why it was tough for him to go to church.  Before he went back inside, I said, “Ben, don’t be afraid to pray for people.  God will use you.” 

I had to sit in my car for a while.  When I pray, I say I want God to speak to me and use me to help others.  When it actually happens, I'm scared to obey and then amazed that He actually did something.  On Thursday, I simply wanted Emilia to respect Miss C. and read.  Being a good reader is just a mundane, third grade expectation.  But over a lifetime, it will lead to tons of success and open doors for Emilia.  A grocery store trip is nothing special.  Saying okay to God instead of giving Him excuses matters.  I don’t know what the checker’s relationship with God is, or what she needed from Him, but I trust that God was very intentional in that situation.  I’m glad I said okay this time and I hope I have the willingness to say okay every time in the future.

John 15:14  "You are my friends if you do what I command."

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