Correspondence From the Ledge

I wrote this poem last month, about one week after my life hit a very low and desperate place. Sometimes I struggle to come to God in those places. Writing poetry helps a lot.



Dear God,
Remember how I used to be?
I used to leap over the hills
Singing all the way.
We had such sweet times,
You and I.
I was happier then
And people admired me.
What am I doing on this cold mountain ledge today?
Why am I fighting the wind,
Clinging to crumbling rock with tired fingers?
I am so tired and afraid.
If only I could go back to those hills.
Right now.
I could do better than I'm doing here.
-Your Brooke

Dear Brooke,
I do remember how you used to be.
Your singing and leaping was sweet indeed.
That was my provision for you
Back then.
Today, my grace has you securely standing on this ledge,
Wind and all.
Tomorrow, we may do something new,
Or we may enjoy this spot a while longer.
Either way, our journey keeps on going.
See, daughter,
Brace yourself for this news -
We aren't going back to the hills.
I'm taking you to places you've never been before.
I've known all along.
Wait until you see - -
It is so awesome further ahead!
But for now,
Release those weary fingers.
Sit with me,
Close to me.
Let's savor the view from here.

-Your God

.

Hello Again

For the past few months, I've met once a week with a small group of women to work through this heinie-kicking book that encouraged us to take risks for God. There's much, much more to tell about that journey, but for now, you should know that that group is the reason I am revisiting this blog. We learned that God asks us to take risks with the gifts He's given us. Writing and teaching are two areas that make me feel absolutely alive - I believe they are indeed gifts from God. I had never considered what it would look like to a risk with either gift. One friend in the group said, "Have you ever thought about writing a blog?"

As it turns out, I have a blog. This very one that you've stumbled upon or purposely sought out today. And, I'm going to write again. I am in a wonderful and difficult season of life now and I expect the posts will reflect that reality. I am letting go of an expectation of perfection or publish-worthy material, so be prepared for work that baffles and bores along with the more inspiring pieces.

If you've read this blog before, you may notice that it has a new title. Psalm 84 is a life passage of sorts. I believe that we are all sojourners, committed to pilgrimage. By God's grace, we make the valleys "a place of springs" and "go from strength to strength". My hope is that what I write here will give you courage to keep going. To commit to your own journey with God, knowing that this will surely mean taking crazy scary risks and, at the end, finding truth. Bless you, my travel buddies. Thanks for reading.